Singapore
I'm asleep by 12.30 but woken five hours later by a text from Matt. His plane is delayed and they're currently on an unscheduled stopover in Dubai, so he's going to be at least three hours late arriving into Singapore, if not more. I roll over and before I know it the alarm goes off. I get out of bed and open the Valentine's card Coman has secreted into my baggage. - awwww! - starting the day with a smile, and grab a quick bit of breakfast.
Zeb, the production manager, has arranged an excursion to the zoo that we're all due to go on at 8am; a chance to get some shots with band members on location. However, when I get downstairs, I'm met with quite a motley bunch. Transpires most of the road crew stayed out til gone five, dancing to a covers band churning out 'Don't Stop Believin' and 'Sweet Child o' Mine' at a club called the Pump Room on Clark Quay, whilst others were carousing in an Irish bar.
Many of them stink of booze and are either still pissed or nursing the start of massive hangovers so I suggest they should try a hair of the dog when we get to the zoo. "Oh no," groans Kerry. "Even the word 'alcohol' makes a little bit of sick come up". It's going to be a hard call to work out who will be better behaved - the animals or the road crew. Twas ever thus!
With Matt now not due to arrive for another few hours I hop into the waiting people carriers without him and we whizz over flyovers, with my van in particular thick with the ripe fumes of alcohol breath. As we drive along, my blackberry beeps - it's Rod texting the breaking news that the band have just won a Grammy in Los Angeles!
We disembark at the zoo, without John or any band members who we now learn are unlikely to make it after all. Undeterred and with members of the plane's flight crew also joining us, we are whisked through the zoo enclosures to meet the orang-utangs and have breakfast with them, something we'd be hoping to use for a photoshoot with the band. No worries - by the time we've all had photos with the orange-furred primates and also holding a rather bemused python, the crew are all starting to enjoy themselves immensely and in the absence of journalist, photographer and band I can relax and enjoy myself too.
But first, as the crew all eat a hearty Singaporean feast to mop up the excess, I draft a press release to announce the Grammy Award and send it over to Rod for worldwide issue.
We then set off around the zoo which is the most animal friendly I've ever seen. A complete lack of bars or restraints gives the illusion that the enclosures are all very sympathetic to the captive residents. Most are circled by water to protect animals and humans from each other, and the design, greenery and space is wonderful to walk around.
An elephant 'display' is not exactly wild and free but then in this part of Asia, elephants tend to be working animals and these are obviously very well cared for. The Splash Safari however is basically a performing seal called Philip. He seems to enjoy himself doing tricks for fish but as Zeb and Gavin, one of the flight attendants on the tour, are corralled to play frisbee with him, it's hard not to feel this is exploitation for the amusement of the crowd, despite the pleas for conservation the announcer makes at the end.
Feeling rebellious I decide to risk the wrath of authorities by chewing some gum. The minty fresh taste is refreshing in the morning heat and I remember the lesson of yesterday and take regular gulps of water to prevent dehydration.
Around the zoo we go, checking out snakes and crocodiles, mongeese, ibex, komodo dragons, gibbons and baboons. There seem to be hundreds of these in a fantastic rock face enclosure, all grooming each other and flirting outrageously. A couple of them are sporting enormous hair do's that look like they've been back-combed and blowdried as though they're '80s pop stars. Zeb opines that they're rocking the Tina Turner look circa 'We Don't Need Another Hero'!
According to the information on display, the massively inflamed posterias some of them have mean they're on heat. And sure enough, a couple amble over to where we're stood and proceed to put on the kind of floorshow you'd see in the sexclubs of Bangkok. Mothers move their children along with gasps of dismay.
Over in the Africa section we see rhinos, lions, leopards, giraffes, zebras and more, all in natural habitats but as ever with any zoo, it's a contradictory experience, where enjoyment mixes with sadness. Overall though, it's about as good as it can be and we all admit we've had a good time.
Just as we're leaving I get a text from Matt to say he's finally landed so I arrange to meet him back at the hotel. He's got to get some sleep first though so I decide to head out to the adjacent shopping mall in search of lunch. A local fast food emporium, Just Acia, tempts me with chicken teriyaki ramen for just $10 and I take a red plastic seat at a formica table and have a fantastically tasty and healthy lunch. They should have these in the UK rather than the monstrosities of KFC or McDonalds.
Back at the hotel I spend a few hours working away on the laptop, getting a whole bunch of stuff done while the UK is still asleep. Being away has its advantages although it reminds me that my inbox will go into Monday meltdown at 6pm Singaporean time, when everyone gets into the London office.
I decide a quick swim is in order to get the blood moving before I meet Matt and take him over to the band's hotel at 6 o'clock to meet Rod and some of the guys for drinks and dinner.
